


You Learn To Live Without

by TheReginaMills



Series: OQ Angst Fest [2]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-11
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-06-25 17:07:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15645183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheReginaMills/pseuds/TheReginaMills
Summary: Day 2 of OQ Angst Fest using prompts 22, 34, 43, and 46!!!





	You Learn To Live Without

**Author's Note:**

> Day 2 of OQ Angst Fest using prompts 22, 34, 43, and 46!!!

The day Robin died, Regina knew immediately. Where the trees were once vibrant and green, they were now a dull monochromatic shade of grey. The world around her had gone black and white and she’d collapsed to the ground. Life without Robin was hardly a life at all, and the colorless world around her was just a reminder of everything she’d lost that day. 

His funeral was bleak, and not just because Regina could no longer see the colors of the world. It rained in heavy sheets all day, by the time they got to the cemetery, she’d had to change from her usual heels to flats so she wouldn’t sink into the grass. Roland had been glued to her side ever since she’d had to break the news to him, and today was no exception. He had part of her dress at her waist balled up in his little fist, his other hand periodically wiping at his eyes. 

Snow walked up behind Regina, placing a hand softly on her shoulder. Regina turned her head to look at the shorter woman and gave her a weak smile. Snow hugged her gently and went to take her seat, patting Regina on the back as she went. Regina followed suit and sat in the first row, Roland by her side. She didn’t hear a single word Archie said about Robin. She didn’t care what he had to say. No one knew her Robin well enough to say anything meaningful about him. She only realized the ceremony was over when people were walking in front of her, placing roses and arrows on his casket and giving her sad smiles. She waited until everyone had gone before she stood, grabbing Roland’s hand and walking up to the casket. 

“Robin…” Regina felt tears burning hot in her eyes. She blinked them away and touched the black casket. “I can’t believe you’re gone, my love. It hurts so much. I trusted you, I loved you, I wanted to be with you forever. But now we can’t. You’re gone and I’m here alone, again.” She wiped at a tear that had escaped her eye and was rolling down her cheek. She reached down and grabbed an arrow, placing it on top of the casket. She knelt down to look Roland in the eye. 

“Honey, would you like to place an arrow for daddy?” He wiped at his nose and nodded, grabbing an arrow with his small and reaching up to place it on the reflective surface. Tears threatened to fall down Regina’s cheeks as she watched the young boy hug the side of the casket, saying goodbye once and for all to the only constant thing he’d ever had in his life. She sniffed and grabbed his hand. 

“Are you ready to go, Roland?”

“Yes, mama.” She froze. He’d never called her mama before. She felt the hot tears slide down her cheeks and reached down, picking Roland up and hugging him tight as she walked away from Robin. Roland waved at the casket before wrapping his arms around Regina’s neck and snuggling his face into her shoulder. 

OQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQOQ

On the one year anniversary of his passing, she pulled herself up the hill he’d been buried on and kneeled next to his grave, slowly tracing the engraving on the stone with her fingers. _Robin Locksley, Beloved Father and Husband_. So generic, so plain. But it was all Regina had been able to think of in her grief. 

“My love, I miss you so. Roland misses you. We all miss you. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to protect you.” She wiped at a tear that had fallen down her cheek. “Mary Margaret thinks I should try dating other people. But she doesn’t see the world like I do. No. She has her beloved soulmate with her. Her world is full of life and color. But I know I will never love another. I don’t know how to not love you. You’ll always be my true love.” 

Tears were flowing freely as Regina stood and placed a single rose on top of his headstone. She slowly made her way down the hill and put her arm around Roland. He wasn’t ready to go to his father’s grave yet, and she didn’t blame him. She wasn’t ready either, but she had to say those things to him before they left for good. She couldn’t live here anymore, not without Robin. He’d have understood. She helped Roland get buckled safely before she got in the driver’s seat. She wiped at one last tear as they drove across the town line into their new lives.


End file.
